Monday, April 15, 2013

Boston, Massachusetts: April 15, 2013


Eight and a half years ago, I started telling my wife Colleen and very close friends that I was going to run a marathon. No one laughed at me, but more than a few people looked at me like I was making a joke. In the fall of 2004, I wasn’t running at all. I wasn’t even walking, with the exception of  few walks around my neighborhood. I was smoking cigarettes. I wasn’t a heavy smoker, but 10-15 cigarettes a day doesn’t do you any favors if you want to go for a 2-3 mile run, let alone run a marathon.

Four months later, I had quit smoking easily enough but was having trouble with my long runs. The program I was doing had me go from a 10-mile run to a 12-mile run to a 14-mile run. The 14-mile run was grueling. During the last mile or two, my legs were jelly and I felt like I was going to fall over. When I got home, I crawled up the stairs of our second floor apartment, stumbled over to the coach, and almost started crying. I don’t show a lot of emotion in general, so Colleen was a little freaked out. “What’s wrong?” she asked, sounding upset.

“I don’t think I can do it .” I told her. “If I feel like that after 14 miles, how am I going to run almost twice as many?”

Two months later, I finished my first marathon.

When the subject of running a marathon comes up, the first question people always ask is “was it hard?” My answer is always the same. “The training is hard. Compared to that, the marathon is easy.”

Training runs were solitary affairs. For the long, weekend run, I’d get up at 5:30 or six in the morning so I could spend some time with Colleen after I got back. For two or three hours, I was by myself. Some runs were better than others, but I can remember the bad ones better than the good ones. One of my favorite memories is running 14 miles for a different marathon in a constant mist on a raw, cool fall day. Besides me, the only people outside were taking their dogs out to go to the bathroom, and they all gave me the same look that said, “I have to be out here. What the hell are you doing out here?”

Race day was different. There’s a lot of anxiety, but the atmosphere at the starting line and throughout is that of a big party. I ran one marathon in Cincinnati and another one in Philadelphia. Both races had throngs of people on the sidelines, cheering you on, telling all of the runners that we were doing a great job, or were looking great, or some other kind of encouragement.

Another popular question that comes up is “what does it feel like to cross the finish line?” This is harder to put into words than whether or not running a marathon is “easy”, but besides watching the birth of my children, it’s the greatest feeling I’ve ever had my life.

As I said above, I didn’t exactly face naysayers, but I did get a lot of reactions that had an underlying “really?” As in, “really, you think you’re going to be able to run 26.2 miles?” Or, “really, you think you’re not going to give up eight weeks into your training?” Or, “really, it’s noble that you want to do this, but you’re going to be really sad and disappointed when you give up…because you eventually will.”

Training for a marathon is a transition from “no I can’t” to “yes I can” and finally to “damn right, I did it!” Once you’re out there running the race, any doubts that you have or that may have been planted by others fall on deaf ears. It’s you out there, and every stride is a triumph before you even cross the finish line. Getting to the starting line is a victory in and of itself.

Except you’re not alone. So many people out there share your story. Their reasons might be somewhat or completely different, but all of the other first timers started out in the same place: deciding to run a marathon but not knowing what the outcome of the decision would be until months of training and preparation.

All of these memories came flooding back today after the I first saw the news about the explosions in Boston.

The Boston Marathon is a different race than the two marathons I ran. Cincinnati (The Flying Pig) and the Philadelphia Marathons are open marathons. Anyone can register and give it a shot. Boston is a qualifying marathon. In order to get in, you have to have finished another marathon under a certain amount of time (there are different time requirements for different age brackets). There aren’t any first-time runners in Boston (theoretically; some people run the race even though they’re not registered).

When you’re running a marathon, around the twentieth or twenty-first mile, the idea of the finish line becomes Valhalla. You start picturing what you’re going to see when you cross, the large crowd, and the festive atmosphere that’s going to be waiting for you there.

On the day I ran the Philadelphia Marathon, Colleen, my then 23-month old daughter Lucy, and our friends Jenn and Jim were waiting for me about half a mile from the finish line. The Philadelphia race goes down this long stretch of a road named Kelly Drive that is bereft of crowds for a good three miles and makes the last few miles difficult. About a mile before the finish line, a few fraternity and sorority houses known as Boathouse Row are where the crowds form. The longer it takes you to finish, the larger those crowds are. I’m far from an elite athlete, so by the time I got there, it was almost impossible to pass through the throng. I didn’t know if Colleen or Lucy were there. I told myself it wouldn’t be the end of the world if I didn’t see them, but when I heard Colleen shout out “Mike!” I instantly knew I had been fooling myself. I saw Colleen’s beautiful face and my little daughter all bundled up in her arms and knew that seeing them made this even more special, and it made the last mile a joy instead of a chore.

I can’t stop thinking about the families that were out there today waiting for their loved ones to cross the finish line. The loving wife or husband who knew that the countless hours of training would impact their weekends for months and not only didn’t complain about it but was supportive and gave everything he or she could and dug deep in his or her own way. The sons and daughters who maybe didn’t completely understand until the moment during the race that Mom or Dad ran past them with a look on his face that they had never seen on Mom or Dad’s face before. The parents who always offered support for their children who weren’t going to miss it when their kids crossed the finish line.

But the other thing I’m left with from today is the countless acts of kindness from so many of the people involved with the race or in the community. The runners who finished the race running to the hospital to give blood. The local entrepreneurs who offered a place to sit, free food for those who couldn’t afford it, and anything else they could do to help. Residents offering strangers with no place to stay a bed or a couch to sleep on. I’m surprised but not surprised, amazed but taking it in stride. Twenty-six-point-two miles builds a community in a short four and a half hour span, an environment that says we’re all in this together whether you’re running the race or just standing there cheering the runners on. Those that have been part of this temporary community of 26.2 at one time or another were less surprised by the random acts of kindness. A marathon is already a miniature miracle: an extraordinary achievement undertaken and frequently achieved by “ordinary” people. The kindness I saw today in Boston I saw in Cincinnati and Philadelphia on smaller, lesser scales but was no less important to those competing. There is nothing like a marathon to remind us that we are all in this together and that – for a short time at least – we can lift each other to heights we never imagined possible.